Microsoft CHRISTMAS97(tm) Error Codes
the assistance of Coffee Crew members Greg A., Jeff G., Pat H., Ken H. and Geoff V. is gratefully acknowledged
- d098 - Decoration Buffer Overflow
- Symptom: Display lights stop flashing. Tree may have toppled.
- Cause: You have attempted to load too many decorations onto your YuleTree(tm) interface.
- Resolution: Remove some ornaments, reset the tree and press the button located on the trunk. Display should start flashing normally.
- p365 - Present Parity Exception (External)
- Symptom: Undifferentiated panic on ChristmasEve(tm). The values of PresentsIn and PresentsOut do not match.
- Cause: You have received a package from someone for whom you didn't buy one.
- Resolution: Purchase another gift license to preserve parity. Microsoft is currently developing a workaround for this problem.
- p366 - Present Parity Exception (Internal) or
q366 - Gift Synchronization Error (either may display)
- Symptom: Panic similar to {error p365} but more intense. HolidaySpirit(tm) crashes with fatal error.
- Cause: You bought a different number or perceived type of presents for each offspring.
- Resolution: None. This is a fatal error. Buy another package for the slighted offspring. Upgrade to Christmas98 as soon as possible and pray they forget.
- u666 - Unexpected Relative, Address Found
- Symptom: Virtual strangers living in your house.
- Cause: This is a compatibility problem with your environment, often caused by insufficiently-specific invitation syntax (such as, "You'll have to come see us sometime" for unspecified values of "sometime").
- Resolution: Although this problem will sometimes go away on its own, it is actually less likely to if you have higher-quality systems installed. You may need to restart your MSHouse(tm), possibly while telling the relative you're fumigating.
Also recommended: upgrade to Christmas98, which offers hardware-level protection (new locks) and software-level integrity checks ("Just *how* are you related to Uncle Bob, again?") to guard against reoccurrence.
- g001 - General Protection Failure
- Symptom: All your presents, decorations, tree and possibly home appliances and jewelry have disappeared.
- Cause:
- You left your door open.
- An unapproved YuleTide(tm) or NativityScape(tm) interface caused a shutdown of your MSHouse(tm) security system.
- Resolution: Restore belongings from backup.
Microsoft CHRISTMAS97 is certified fully Year1900 compliant.
Original content on this page ©1998 Alan P. Scott. This is a spoof (duh); the actual Microsoft corporation bears no responsibility for the contents of this page. All rights reserved.
This document was last updated December 30, 1998.
Contact me:
ascott@pacifier.com